Out With The Old!
I have noticed that I have a weird relationship with the stuff I own. I had to part with most of the things I had when I broke up with my ex (a long and sodden story) and after that incidence I have developed rather fixated attitude towards material things which has started to bug me. I know that starting basically from scratch was both mentally and financially challenging for me and this is perhaps one of the reasons why I tend to cling stubbornly to everything I have.
For awhile now I have found the idea of living simple very intriguing. I have asked myself again and again: Do I own my stuff, or does my stuff own me? I know from experience that emotionally charged relationship to material things can drag one down so I try my best to part with some items I really don’t need anymore. However, there is a wicked twist in the whole thing. Parting with excessive stuff doesn’t happen that easy.
By decluttering my life I would like to identify what is most important to me and eliminate everything else. I have heard though that getting to simplicity isn’t always a simple process. Rather it can be seen as a journey of two steps forward, and one backward. I guess I made a huge leap forward by realizing that after all these years I still haven’t made peace with my past. I should learn to let go the things I once had and accept the fact that they are part of someone else’s life now, not mine.
So I guess it’s out with the old, then. May the only permanent thing in life is change be my new motto from now on.
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Yep, that’s a hard process. I’m going – or trying to go – through that myself too. I have loads of stuff that I never use, and still can’t give them up. There’s always that small voice inside my head telling me that you will regret this later, the day will come when you need that thing… and in some level I know it will not happen.
Maybe the real problem is that a few times in my past I’ve tried to somehow erase my previous life by trowing away stuff that reminded me of it. And of course doing it that way was a mistake, because it forced me to also throw away things that were meaningful to me. And I’ve missed them ever since.
So I think that the right way to do it is to sort the stuff to meaningful and meaningless things and do the out with the old only to the latter part.
I think I will be decluttering soon. Definitely my desk, maybe my closet. My desk is a mess with knick-knacks, doo-dads, and whatchamacallits. Old receipts in drawers, half scribbled sheets, dry markers, random flyers, tums, teddy bear hair ties, cds, nail polish and a whole lot of other unnecessary items. Too chaotic. I can’t find peace working at it. And the closet, I’m finding a few pieces that I seem to have attached either unpleasant or odd emotions too, and they infuriate me now.
Anu: Thanks for your thoughts. It’s good to know that I’m not alone with this. I have tried to erase my past by throwing away stuff from some particular era as well. CD’s, clothes, photos, you name it, they’re all gone. Now I feel so sorry I didn’t even save my diaries. This time though it’s all about stuff I really don’t need anymore.
Bigglassesgirl: I don’t have a problem with my desk but my closets are a mess. Good luck with your spring clean, I’ll do the same!